The Film (0/5)
A young woman (Mira, played by Melody Wiggins) and her fiancť (Daniel, played by Kelay Miller) are accosted on the beach by a pair of bikers. Daniel manages to kill one of the bikers, but the other ends up stabbing him to death, leaving Mira to watch in horror, aaaaand then ride off into the sunset with the surviving biker, because heís what she calls a ďreal man.Ē Except that itís all a ruse and she stabs him to death in a hotel room. From there she sets off on a murderous rampage, determined to rid Los Angeles of all of its violent garbage people. Meanwhile, Danielís brother David (Michael Gradilone) is trying to infiltrate the biker gang that killed his brother and track down Mira to stop her killing spree.
It might sound interesting, and in the hands of another filmmaker it might be interesting, but instead itís awful. Just amateurish and poorly written, acted, directed, edited, and scored. Surprisingly well-shot, but thatís the only thing that isnít just downright terrible.
But chances are you already know that. This is one of those films thatís riding that new trend of ironic appreciation, appealing to the itís-so-bad-itís-good crowd. And as such itís kind of review-proof.
ďWell of course itís terrible, thatís why we love it!Ē
And admittedly, Iím not part of that crowd. I had to start this three times before I could get through it without falling asleep. And with all the praise itís getting, I canít help but feel like people are desperate to champion it so they can say theyíre in on the joke. Itís like those people who used to run around saying that your opinion on film in general was invalid because you never saw Troll 2. Itís straight-up hipster cinema. And for all the people calling it ďthe holy grail of holy fucking shitĒ (the Drafhouse films tagline), or ďthe supreme masterpiece of no-rules action film insanityĒ (Hitfix), or ďÖa transmission from an alien worldĒ (The AV Club) or any other hyperbolic nonsense, Iím just kind of forced to roll my eyes. Itís just a bad movie. Itís not more bad than any other bad movie, itís not even Ďinsaneí Ė itís just a shitty, boring, kinda gross movie.
And if thatís your thing then cool, I suppose. You do you. Just donít pretend that itís something special.
Itís cheaply made and cheaply mixed, but the people at Drafthouse made sure to put a lot of TLC into restoring a cheap shitty film so I mean it looks and sounds good, sorta?
Continuing on with the trend of putting a whole lot of inexplicable effort into this, Drafthouse actually put together a decent little package. Thereís a Commentary with Zack & Bryan from Destroy All Movies, a featurette called Thatís So John Rad, an interview with the Director of Photography Peter Palian, and an episode of a local TV Access show that director John Rad was a guest on.
I tried with each of these things, but I just couldnít take all the self-congratulatory ďthis is soooooo hilariousĒ nonsense. Again, Iím not the target audience. If you are youíll probably find a lot to love.
Itís a shitty movie that doesnít even have the distinction of being unique, or creative, or original in any way. And it certainly is not, as the back of the Blu-ray case says, ďÖa pulse-pounding, heart-stopping, brain-devouring onslaught of 80s thunder, 90s lightning, and pure filmmaking daredevilry from another time and/or dimension.Ē