Normally, I describe the contents of a release and then give a recommendation at the end. The AGFA Mystery Mixtape Vault does not describe the contents of the release and in keeping with the spirit of a mystery release, I will give my recommendation in the introductory paragraph. If you want to go into the release blind, as I did, then I will provide a big all capital letters spoiler alert. That said, AFGA released a mixtape collection with over 500 minutes of mixtape fun. I have had nothing but good experiences with the AGFA mixtapes in the past and this one maybe one of the best. That may be partially due to the sheer amount of material in this two-disc Blu-ray set, but it also delivers in quantity. Each mixtape is roughly one hour, providing a very episodic viewing experience. I have to say this is definitely one of my most hearty recommends.

SPOILERS!!! Do not read on if you want to preserve the mixtape mystery.

The first disc I popped in only had three mixes. The first was a Christmas special mixtape, lasting about 69 (giggity) minutes. The opening was a British cooking show edited to make all the cook’s dialogue sound sexual, threatening, or sexually threatening. They spliced in scenes from a Max Headroom Christmas special. One of the funniest (though I’d be hard-pressed to explain why it was so funny) was a Happy Days holiday special edited down to only every use of the word “Christmas”. They repeat this with other sitcom Christmas Specials. Dee Snider was a guest VJ for MTV at Christmas and added a little nostalgic levity. There was a musical interlude composed of old Christmas themed computer graphics that took me back to the 80s and 90s. The music continued with multiple bizarre or terrible Christmas musical performances. Ending it on a high note, they play the full video of an amazing Weird Al song “Christmas at ground zero”.

Stairway to Stardom mixtape (69 “Heyooo!” minutes):
In the 1980s, there was a New York public access show where random people could show off their talents: singers, dancers, magicians, and stand-up comics. This is one of the weaker mixtapes to me because the humor is all derived from deluded people thinking they are going to “make it big”. It is funny in small doses but is too much of the same for an hour. This mixed tape has a commentary track with AGFA employees as a special feature.

Late night mixed tape (70 minutes):
The theme of this mixtape is late-night broadcast television. In the days before VOD and streaming, late night was where viewers could find more niche programming. The highlights of this mix were a televangelist singing and doing faith healing, strange commercials, and outtakes of people losing their tempers on-set. Seeing a strait-laced salesman let loose a string of expletives in the middle of professional shoot never ceases to crack me up. One of the funniest segments was a Ronald and Nancy Reagan anti-drug PSA, re-edited to make it pro-drug.

Moving on to the second disc, there are five mystery mixtapes.
AGFA Mystery Mixtape #1. 59 mins
Bad movie awards from USA Up All Night. I used to watch “up all night” all of the time. It was a place to see hilarious B-movies on one of the few channels we had back then. Gilbert Godfrey was a host and there was a moment where he is doing a spot-on Andrew Dice Clay impersonation. The USA movie awards continue throughout the entire mix amid several horror related documentaries.
I am a Stuart Gordon fan, and they show a good portion of an interview for “The Re-Animator”. That segues into footage from a horror convention. There is a documentary on Linda Blair in the Exorcist and how she received hate for the role. Returning to Stuart Gordon projects, there is a surprise set of interviews from the crew of “Bride of the Re-Animator”. Another mini documentary focused on the special effects for the Curse 2 with “Screaming Mad George”. The final segment is “Don’t Open Until Christmas” behind the scenes footage.

AGFA Mixtape #2: Later in LA (60 minutes)
Tim Burton interview during the release of Batman Returns. This interview is long but broken up throughout the entirety of the mixtape. It is an interesting interview, giving me a refreshed appreciation for Burton. Wernor Herzog is interviewed about Nosferatu: The Vampire. A young Llyod Kaufman gives an interview behind the scenes at the notorious B-movie company, Troma. If anyone remembers the TMNT “Coming Out of Their Shell Tour”, there is a making of doc, followed by a featurette on the Tobe Hooper directed film “Lifeforce”. Closing out the mix was a very interesting episode of Tom Snyder’s show discussing movie monsters and one of guests is Peter Cushing.

AGFA Mystery Mixtape #3: Sequelitis
It starts off with footage from an awards show called the “Horror Hall of Fame”. I actually remember recording onto a VHS tape from live TV. There is a trailer for a fake movie about the letter B attacking people. It expressed a lot of Meta-humor for the Era, despite being a one note joke.
Rattling off a quick list of other scattered segments:

A trailer form “Bram Stoker’s Dracula” by Coppola
Behind the scenes on Jaws the Revenge.
A short documentary on Freddy Kruger.
A Voivod music video which had terrible production value.
A strange art piece with a cyclops spraying blood from its eye while two floating heads bookend it.
It ends with Siskel and Ebert giving no votes to a slew of movies.

AGFA Mixtape #4: Follow Your Own Star
This one opened with a strange question for the audience, “do you believe in ghosts?”, followed by an early John Carpenter interview around the release of Halloween. There was an interesting promotional video for video store owners for the movie “Ticks” that included ideas on how to generate buzz around the release. Interspersed throughout the mixtape is footage from some TV movie called “North Star” about an astronaut who gets smarter in sunlight. There are also a variety of FEDEX commercials that made me miss the days of Commercials like that, humorous while still explaining the product/service.
HBO has gone through many promos over the years and created a mini-doc about an HBO promo where they constructed a highly intricate 30-foot-long model city for a single shot. If you have ever wanted to learn the sport of curling, there is an ad for a curling training videotape. Behind the scenes on the set of “Yellowbeard”, I have never seen this pirate comedy, but it has a stacked cast. Returning to John Carpenter, there is an “Escape from L.A.” documentary. The final segment was Billy Crystal’s impressive performances as the celebrity guest on a gameshow.

AGFA Mixtape #5: Haunted Lives (60 mins)

The final mystery mixtape focused mainly on rock music and horror movies:
A TV show about a haunted Toys R US. GG Allen interview with Geraldo Rivera and another episode with Jerry Springer. GG Allen’s final interview on the Jane Whitney show.
Sam Raimi interview around making Evil Dead.
Headbanger’s Ball Halloween Special on MTV with Alice Cooper with guests like Iggy Pop and Dave Mustaine.
Making of Poltergeist
Clive Barker The Art of Horror documentary.
An 80s Camero commercial full of 80s stereotypes and may be one of the worst muscle car commercials that I’ve seen.
A Dario Argento featurette.
Poltergeist 3 edited down to only the use of proper names.

I recommended this two-disc release in my opening paragraph, but wanted to reiterate how much fun content is contained in the mystery vault. It is definitely work picking up in terms of quality, quantity, and as a pop-culture time capsule.